What am I supposed to eat?

I'll be flat out honest with you: I've been struggling with my weight since I was 12 years old. I was a skinny kid up until 6th grade. My dad was worried I wasn't going to grow muscle. And then I just exploded. I easily put on 20lbs of blubber for no discernible reason within a few short months. None of my old clothes fit around me.

I'm 35 today. My weight has been a roller coaster. I constantly think about the weight coming back. I get on the scale every morning.

During my teens and 20s, I found cycling to be a fun way to keep the weight off and "not worry" about what I ate. But I've always had a layer of fat on me. Still do, in fact.

All that changed when Sony dropped the Playstation. That thing was addictive. Night and day, the playstation was on. I was either fighting or racing. And my clothes got tighter.

Unlike my super-awkward 6th grade self, my somewhat awkward grown-up self can identify what went wrong this time: my steady diet of Mt. Dew, onion rings and Runzas. (There was a Runza across the street from my old apartment.) Every so often I would pay my body a little respect with a salad. Or potato chips. Heck, I might go to Subway for lunch. Seemed to work for that Jared guy.

Oh yeah, and LaBamba Burritos. "Burritos as Big as Your Head!". Oh SNAP those were good.

Needless to say, I abused my body's ability to properly burn fuel. I topped out at 262.8lbs. That's what I weighed at my first Weight Watcher's meeting back in 2002. 4 years later I was down to just a hair under 182lbs. It's been five and a half years since my last WW meeting, and I've been fluctuating between 181 and 205lbs since. (I have had a couple mornings below 180, but those were due to dehydration.)

I stopped going to the meetings because I wasn't making weight progress and I was chronically hungry. I was tired. I was crabby. I started smoking cigarettes again. I would wake up in the middle of the night and think about eating food. I craved apple fritters.

The only way to shut off the late night cravings was to eat something, and the only thing in the cupboards that seemed like it might be tasty was peanut butter. I would eat it straight out of the jar. I would fall asleep fast after that. And then the next day I would have to make an adjustment because, "OMG I ATE 8 POINTS WORTH OF PEANUT BUTTER LAST NIGHT!!!"

Some days I just didn't care. I'd go to Runza and kick it old school with a gigantic Mt. Dew, Large Onion Rings and double cheeseburger, because fuck it: I'm not getting anywhere anyways.

Needless to say, the cycle got vicious.

Note: I'm not disparaging Weight Watchers. Frankly, the plan saved my life. It got me away from the ledge. But something wasn't clicking for me as I was reducing the number of "points" I consumed.

Points are a proprietary system developed by Weight Watchers. It's ever-changing, but the gist of it is that all foods have a point value, the low-fat and/or high-fiber foods have a lower point value, so you're encouraged to eat more of them in a given day. It's a simplified method of "conventional dieting". It works for a lot of people.

One can also earn points through exercise based on time, body weight and exercise intensity. A half hour to an hour on the bike would yield me 2-6 points, depending on the intensity and duration. Heck, Mowing the lawn was 3 points. A bottle of beer was 3 points. Coincidence? I say not!

So, to maximize my food volume while keeping a small points footprint, a typical meal could include burritos made with fat free refried beans on a fat free whole wheat tortilla made with 93% lean ground turkey and reduced fat cheddar cheese. Another evening would include boneless/skinless chicken with a side of brown rice, steamed veggies and some reduced fat cheddar cheese melted over the top of the rice for some flavor.

(Sure, I would spend fewer "Points" by eating fat free cheddar, but that lasted a day: fat free cheddar doesn't melt. It scorches. On the other hand, I willingly indulged in fat-free mozzarella, because it melted. Looking back, I must have rocks for brains: fat free mozzarella should not melt, but it contains a collection of chemicals to ensure it does. And I ate it.)

There were some nights when I muttered "J.F.C., not this shit again" to myself when I sat down to eat.

Activity became a means to an end. A ride from the South Walmart (still under construction during those days) to Palmyra and back was about an hour and 15 minutes and meant ice cream or pizza while staying "on plan".

Not that it mattered. I wasn't getting anywhere during those last two months. I still had a layer of fat on me. I was 14lbs away from goal. And I was hungry all the time.

Why?

Last year I picked up Joe Friel's Cyclist's Training Bible. Chapter 16 is entitled "Fuel". There's a subheader called "Carbohydrates". Page 251 includes these two paragraphs:

When you eat a high-carbohydrate meal or snack, the pancreas releases insulin to regulate the level of blood sugar. That insulin stays in the blood for up to two hours, during which time it has other effects, such as preventing the body from utilizing stored fat, converting carbohydrates and protein to body fat, and moving fat in the blood to storage sites. This may explain why, despite serious training and eating a "healthy" diet, some athletes are unable to lose body fat.

[snip]

Notice in Table 16.2 that many of the foods that have a moderate to high glycemic index are the ones we have typically thought of as "healthy" and therefore eaten liberally. These include starchy foods such as cereal, bread, rice, pasta, potatoes, crackers, bagels, pancakes, and bananas. No wonder so many endurance athletes are always hungry and have a hard time losing excess body fat.

If there's too many words quoted, then perhaps this humorous video clip from Tom Naughton's 2009 Documentary "Fat Head" can hold your attention, it says roughly the same thing:




This resonates with my "dieting" experience like a gong: my weight problem isn't how much, it's what and why.

While I still have trouble avoiding carbohydrate temptation (downfalls include pancakes or Mt. Dew Throwback, this list is woefully incomplete I might add), I try to avoid consuming them on "light activity" days.  And some days it is really trying...

And just between you, me, and the rest of the blogosphere: when I eat a low carb meal before a ride (bacon cheese burger or a three-egg omelette with a side of bacon, or just bacon), I feel like I've been using some performance enhancing drug. It takes longer to "bonk", despite riding at higher intensities than I could after fueling with pancakes or pop-tarts.

Perhaps it's just a placebo effect, but I can't help but think the reduction in insulin lets the fat out of the bags and the glycogen out of the liver, availing it for Super High Intensity Training.

If you've never had a weight issue, chances are you probably think I'm off my rocker. That's okay.  I think what I'm experiencing is what reasonably fit folks refer to as "normal".

It costs me more money to bike than to drive.

So last week I set my Facebook status to something along the lines of "I haven't put gas in my car for three months", which prompted one of my cousins (I have many) to point out how much money I must be saving.

If I did save a bunch of money, that would be a sweet bonus, but that's not why I do it. I'm definitely not saving money by riding, that's for sure. 

I put 13.2 gallons in the tank last week. The car traveled 276.1 miles on that 13.2 gallons of gas. 276.1/13.2 = 20.9167 miles to the gallon.

My driving commute is 7.9 miles. At 20.9167 miles to the gallon, 7.9 miles comes to 0.377 gallons of fuel burned on my drive. At $2.679 per gallon, that is roughly 1 dollar and one cent in each direction.

So I spend roughly $2.02 per day when I drive my car to work.

I spent $35.36 ($2.679 per gallon) on those 13.2 gallons of gas. I assure you, I spent a heck of a lot more on food during that time.

I have to point out that on the days I ride my bike, I cannot stop thinking about food. It's like being a teenager all over again, but without the acne. There's a good reason for that. My heart rate monitor tracks calories burned. An easy ride is about 350 calories in one direction. A 20+mph headwind means nearly 550 calories in one direction.

But for argument's sake, we'll say I burn off 750 calories each day I ride my bike to and from work.

What does 750 calories look like?

I'll skip over most vegetables. While I like vegetables (the vitamin and mineral content simply cannot be beat) and eat more than I need in a day, exclusively fueling up on them is cost-prohibitive, not to mention outright painful given the quantities needed.

A cup of romaine lettuce has about 10 calories. I need 75 cups of romaine lettuce to get 750 calories. 75 cups = 4.68 gallons. I can't eat that much lettuce in a week, much less a day. A cup of diced celery is 17 calories. I think you can see where I'm going here.

Apples

A 4oz apple contains 65 calories. I will need to eat eleven and a half apples to make up the calorie difference. That's 2.8lbs. At $2 a pound (I don't eat Red Delicious apples), we're looking at $5.60 each day.

Gym-Rat Candy

A chocolate Powerbar is 230 calories. They are available at the grocery store for about $1.59 each. I need three of them, that totals up to $4.77. (Don't kid yourself, they're candy: the fat and protein difference between a Powerbar and a Milky Way is insignificant.)

Chicken

A 4oz grilled chicken breast is 130 calories. I will need to eat nearly six of those to make up the calorie difference. That's a pound and a half of chicken, or about $4.50, if it's on sale.

Bacon

Bacon is roughly $3 a pound in your grocer's refrigerator case and is split up into 16 one-ounce slices, each packing a walloping 50 calories. That means I need to eat 15 slices of bacon to fuel up.

Who am I kidding? 15 slices? Make it 16. I'm not leaving that last slice of smoky, salty goodness in the package for tomorrow, I'm eating it now. I burn off $3 worth of bacon a day. 

Fast Food

Burger king has a "Buck Double", after state and local taxes (it's prepared food, grocery items are not taxed in Nebraska), it comes out to $1.07. It contains 410 calories. A small onion rings with sweet and sour sauce is 1.49+tax, or $1.60 and brings another 360 calories to the party. That brings my total to 770 calories for $2.67.

Bananas

The banana is the training fuel of choice for many athletes: they're tasty, they're compact, they're full of energy, they're inexpensive and they're packaged in an all-natural bio-degradable case. A 4oz banana contains 121 calories. I need just six of those. Bananas are roughly 50 cents a pound, so it's $1.50 a day.

Yes, the banana saves me about 50 cents a day over gasoline, but that's certainly not enough to make me feel smug about how much money I'm saving when I check my bank balance. I eat a whole variety of foods, not just bananas and they're more expensive.

No, if I truly wanted to save money, I would eat heavily processed factory-foods almost exclusively. Supermarket junk food is almost always cheaper than gasoline when used as a bike fuel. Cases in point:

Pop Tarts

Pop tarts are 205 calories per pastry, they come two to a pouch. You need two pouches, or 2/3 of a box, to get your calorie needs met. That amounts to $1.33 a day to fuel up with pop tarts.

Cardboard Pizza

Tombstone pizza. 1/5 of a cardboard pepperoni pizza is 312 calories. I need to eat roughly half of the pizza to meet my calorie needs. They're 4/$10 (on sale), or $2.50 each. So it's $1.25/day to fuel up on a Tombstone death disk.

The Greatest Food Ever


An apple fritter contains 650 calories and costs roughly 99 cents.That means it's about 1.20 to fuel up on this glorious amalgamation of dough and fruit.

Mac and Cheese

Kraft Mac and Cheese: A box of prepared mac and cheese (with 1/4c milk and 2 tablespoons of butter) will get you about 600 calories. The box is about 79 cents, the milk is about a nickel and the butter a dime. I still need 1 and a quarter boxes (or 2.5 servings) to make up the calorie deficit incurred by riding my bike. It will cost me about $1.15 per day to fuel up with Kraft Mac and Cheese.

Broke college kid food

Ramen noodles. A single brick prepared according to package directions contains 380 calories. I saw cases of ramen at the grocery store for $2.40/12, or 20 cents per brick. I only need two bricks to make up the difference there, so it only costs 40 cents a day to fuel with ramen.

I eat a wide variety of foods, and frankly, gas has to cost $4 per gallon for me to break even on fuel costs.

What I don't save in money, I save in time. I get 3-6 hours of exercise each week without setting foot in a gym, where "normal folks" stand around for upwards of an hour waiting in line to ride a bike that goes nowhere.

But let's not overlook the real lesson here: if I really wanted to, I could maintain my weight while eating two apple fritters and a pound of bacon every day, followed with a heavy dose of leafy vegetables to help rid my body of toxins.

I just have to bike.

I pedaled off 798 calories today. I think I'll have another slice of bacon.